What is in a name ~ Part II

The original "What is in a name" was posted about how we chose Noah's name: http://amhamann.blogspot.com/2011/09/whats-in-name.html  

Now it is Meredith's turn.
  
Truth be told I am the one who brought the name Meredith to the table when Reid and I talked about girl names.  I first fell in love with the name when I taught daycare and preschool at the YMCA in Plano, IL.  I had two students with the name Meredith.  One girl was absolutely adorable with her brown eyes and Shirley Temple curls and she had a spunky attitude that would not quit.  The other girl was a preschooler of mine that had the sweetest face and kindest heart I have ever seen in a four year old.  It is really because of these two girls that I loved the name Meredith. 
When I was pregnant and before we knew that baby was a girl, I was driving and the name Meredith popped into my head randomly.  I thought to myself, "I think I am having a girl and her name will be Meredith."  When it came to a middle name I wanted to honor  family.  The name Louise was both of my grandmothers' middle names.

As we were sitting in the doctor's waiting room waiting to have my 20 week ultrasound the news of Nelson Mandela's death came across the television.  They spoke of his strong warrior spirit while he was imprisoned for 27 years as well as his leadership while president of South Africa.  Again the name Meredith popped into my head.  Meredith's name means ruler/leader/chief and her middle name Louise means warrior. I really feel that we didn't choose to name her Meredith, but instead we were chosen to raise a leader and a warrior...a Meredith Louise.

Meredith's Story

A friend of mine had posted once that, "The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why."  For me the "day" you find out why is September 20, 2011 and April 13th, 2014.  My children are the 'why' in my life.  The following is Meredith's story :)
It was really important to me that Dr. Ford delivered my baby.  She brought Noah into this world two and a half years ago and I have the utmost trust in abilities as a doctor. 
I was going to be induced on April 15th for two reasons:

1-  I was exactly one week before my due date and the earliest I could be induced (39 weeks)
and
2-  If I was induced early I would not have to leave the hospital in a moving truck since we had to move the day after my actual due date of April 22nd. 

Dr. Ford had assured me that even if she was not on-call she would make every effort to be there to deliver this baby.  The only foreseeable exception was the weekend before I was going to be induced (April 12-13th) because she would be out of town.  Now I am sure you can all see where this is going...

That Saturday (April 12th)  I was extremely tired all day long.  That night we were going out to eat with some friends at Cheeseburger In Paradise in Downers Grove, IL.  To be completely honest I was looking forward to a virgin margarita.  On the way to the restaurant my contractions were about 8-10 minutes apart which was fine because I was not going to have my baby that weekend so bring on the contractions.  When we got to the restaurant I informed our friends that I might be in labor, but its not a big deal because I was not going to have my baby until at least Sunday night when my doctor was going to be home.

Nothing on the menu sounded good except salmon. After the waiter took our order  my contractions were about 6-7 minutes apart.  I called the waiter back to the table to cancel my order.  I explained to him that I was in labor and probably would not be able to finish my salmon and I would not be able to eat it until after I came home from the hospital and we all know salmon does not reheat well.  He looked at me like either I was crazy or just trying to be funny. 

I tell Reid that when him and Noah are done eating we should probably go so I can get my over night bag.  When I was pregnant with Noah my hospital bag had been in my car when I was 35 weeks pregnant and the car seat had been installed and re-installed 15 times just to make sure it was snug.  With this pregnancy my hospital bag was at home and not completely packed and I was not quite sure where the car seat was.  As we left the restaurant my contractions were 5 minutes apart.  I convinced/demanded that Reid drive back home so I could get my hospital bag even though the hospital was between the restaurant and home.

We arrive at the hospital around 9:00 pm.  We meet my friend Carol at the emergency room entrance so she could take Noah back to our house.  I kissed my sweet baby goodnight and it was in that moment I knew that the next time I saw him we would be a family of four.

So there we are,  Saturday night and no favorite doctor around and to top it off it is my bedtime.  All I want to do is crawl in my select comfort bed with my 37 pillows to keep me "comfortable" and watch an episode of MASH.

At 3:36 am our Meredith Louise Hamann was born.  7 lbs 9 oz and 19 1/2 inches long.

I was so blessed that my friend Ellie captured Meredith's entrance into this world.  She made the beautiful slide show that I want to share.  Now, there is no "Money Shot" as I like to call it, but you can definitely see legs, umbilical cord and breastfeeding.  For me this video is priceless and I am sharing it because it is part of Meredith's story and her story is amazing and beautiful. 

This pregnancy has been on my check off list along with packing, moving, and trying to remain sane, but when I watch this video all the "need to do" items fall away.  When I watch this video my life slows down and I have peace with the chaos that surrounded her birth. 

My hope is that you can appreciate the beauty of Meredith's arrival.

Beginning

"Modern Pioneer" is the beginning of my continued blog...OK I know that sounds odd, but there is a good reason for this new blog.  I felt that a new blog name was in order.  I am in no way comparing myself to the original pioneers.  Lets be honest, I never would have lasted three minutes in a covered wagon.  They would have booted me off at the first grassy intersection. 

"Modern Pioneer" is not something that I am, but instead something that I strive to be.  I hope you enjoy reading this and hopefully I enjoy living it :)

Things To Do

I am a list person. 
I love writing lists and then being able to cross items off. 
So in an effort to wrap my mind around what has to happen in the next 6 weeks I am boring everyone with my current "To Do" list:

Continue growing a human
Find a place to live in South Dakota
      (this item has caused a large quantity of tums to be consumed)
Find boxes for packing
Assemble Boxes
Tell two year old to get out of boxes
Decide what can be packed now
Pack
Attend doctor's appointments
Move "unneeded" items to the storage unit
Go back to storage unit when "unneeded" items
      turn into "needed" items
Research best deal on moving truck
Cry when realization hits that moving is expensive
Continue boxing everything that will not be needed
      in less then two week time span
Have baby (April 15th induction)
(due date is April 22nd and we move on the 23rd...
      I refuse to leave the hospital in a moving truck)
Get home from hospital and pack some more
Celebrate Easter
Attend doctor appointment for baby
Touch up paint in house so house is ready for renters
Load moving truck (around April 23rd-week after baby is born)
Consider being sedated and packed in the moving truck
      with all of our things
Drive out to South Dakota with two year old and newborn
Feel sorry for myself because I am in a car for many hours
      after having a baby a week ago
Stop at gas station, buy skittles in purple package and Mt. Dew
      in order to feel a euphoric sugar rush
Consider moving to a warmer climate
Get to South Dakota and hopefully move into some type of housing
      that is not a hotel
Consider being sedated while boxes are being unpacked

Anyone want to trade To-Do Lists :)

Modern Pioneer

There is no covered wagon, but the journey begins. 

I have known that my husband was put on this earth to be a farmer ever since he took me to his parents' farm.  Even as we studied at Crother's Engineering Hall at South Dakota State University I knew that his passion involved not sitting behind a computer for the rest of his life, but being outside working a half section of land.  His passion did not change when I married him over five years ago. So if I have not made myself clear, I married a farmer.

Me on the other hand...

I was put on this earth to enjoy air conditioning.  I strongly dislike being outside unless the weather is perfect, but even that can be ruined by a few bugs.  I have a healthy fear of cows and for some reason I associate farm machinery with missing limbs.  Also, my idea of "gardening" is remembering to water the house plants that have been given to me over these past few years.  There are two that have survived my neglectful caretaking ways.  I was not put on this earth to work the land.  My husband did not marry a farmer. 

This spring we are taking the trail back west to try our hand a farming in South Dakota.  Now I say "our hand" because even though my husband will be the one farming, with a career change like this comes a lifestyle change as well.  And also because when I say that "Reid is farming" my hubby politely corrects me and says, "We are farming honey". 

To put it simply I am terrified.

I did not grow up on a farm.  Saying I know anything (which I don't) about the ways of farm life is like someone without children saying then know anything about parenting.  Until you have experienced it you have no idea.

I can't say that  I will hate it or that I will love it.  So it is because of the uncertainty that I stomp my feet and hold my breath (much like my two year old son) when faced with the change.

I guess the best way to describe my feelings about this new journey is to compare it to winter in the Midwest.  Every year winter comes.  It is not a surprise or shock since every year of the 30 years I have been alive there has been snow that has fallen from the sky and cold in the air.  Every single year.  Still every fall there is a period of mourning.  The loss of warmth outside and not wanting the change of the seasons to happen.  I don't love the idea of winter, but then I look outside and the reality of the quiet peaceful blanket of snow warms my spirit.  That blanket is the blank canvas for what will grow in the spring.  New life and new possibility.

I get so caught up in why this is not for me that I don't take the time to see this move for what it is...an opportunity for God to warm my spirit.  This is my blank canvas with new possibility. I just hope that the spirit warming can be done indoors with no bugs :)

God Created a Farmer

Every Wednesday I have the privilege of teaching confirmation.  I really enjoy going.  Not only because the students are a great bunch of kids, but because I feel like I learn so much.  I often find myself calling my Dad (my pastor growing up) and telling him about the great things that I learned that night.  My Dad listens and then we have a great discussion about whatever the subject was.  The whole time I am sure my Dad is thinking, "Yes dear sweet daughter, you learned those things when I taught you confirmation too."

The other week we were discussing stewardship.  Which in short is our duty to care for our environment.  With this discussion came the reading of Genesis 27-30.  To sum it up God created humankind and made us caretakers of the land and animals.  Stewards of the world.  Then it goes on to say that we totally jacked that up and then there were thorns, disease, painful childbirth and death. Just to name a few...

What struck me most about all of that was that the first profession was farming.  A relationship was created between humans and the earth. Now you can't talk about that relationship without hearing Paul Harvey's gruff voice...

"And on the 8th day God looked down on his planned paradise and said, “I need a caretaker!”.

 So, God made a farmer. 

You may think this rings a bell and for those of you who watched the Superbowl last year you may remember a certain Dodge Truck commercial...

Starbucks Theory

I have a theory when it comes to the economy, it is call the Starbucks Theory. 

Although I am not a big coffee drinker I still have made my way into Starbucks for a cup of iced caramel whipped cream with sprinkles amazing goodness (might not be the technical name).  A drink like that runs around $5 or so.  Like I said, I am not a "once a day" Starbucks customer, but I know people that are.  I guess to make a long paragraph short...drinking "The Bucks" daily is not cheap, but consumers are willing to pay it.

When I moved to Kendall County Illinois in 2008 there was not much as far as shopping went.  Then came Target and a Kohls with a strip mall attached.  When I was volunteering one weekend I met some people who had the inside knowledge of what businesses were going to come to this area.  There were names like Jcpenny, Barnes and Noble, Bath and Body Works, Chilis and Buffalo Wild Wings.  Kendall County was welcoming business with open arms. 

Then as we all know the economy took a Thelma and Louis nose dive off the cliff with no air bags.  All of the businesses that had not yet made their presence known in this area pulled up steak.

Fast forward to Fall 2013 and in one of the strip mall business windows hung a banner letting everyone know that a Starbucks was coming soon!

My theory is this, if people are willing to pay $5 a day for a coffee drink then the economy has to be getting better.

We Run As One

This past Sunday I participated in my first ever half-marathon. In all of the racing packets there was a blue arm band with yellow writing that said,

"We Run As One - Boston 2013". 

We were asked to wear it at the start of our race and when asked, raise the banded arm as we observed 26 seconds of silence for the events that took place at the Boston Marathon this year.  So as all 7000 + runners stood behind the starting line we all raised our arms to the sky and silenced our mouths for those 26 seconds.  While I stood there I couldn't help but let tears tumble down my face.  I thought about what the race stood for.

"The legend states that Pheidippides, a greek messenger, was sent running from the battlefield of Marathon to Athens to announce that the Persians had been defeated in the Battle of Marathon (in which he had just fought).  It is said that he ran the entire distance (we observe the spirit of the story with a 26.2 mile race) without stopping and burst into the assembly, exclaiming, "We wοn", before collapsing and dying.^{"
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marathon)}

The message that I take from the story is to run the race, deliver the message, and fight the good fight.  So in those moments of silence before our race I felt we were doing just that.  We were delivering the message loud and clear, "Violence will never destroy our spirit".  In that moment I became overwhelmingly proud to be a part of this community of people called runners.

Mother's Day

 

For Mother's Day I knew that Noah would probably not know exactly what I would like so I went ahead and bought myself a dozen chocolate covered strawberries.   I figure he would want me to have my absolute favorite sweet. 

 

Before I finish my story I should probably explain to those who don't know about my son and his blanket.  My husband and I call Noah "Linus" because he totes his blue blanket around just like the Charlie Brown character.  He also loves to suck his thumb while holding a corner of the blanket.  There are times when I have been rocking him to sleep that he will have his eyes closed and will still search the blanket for the corner before planting his thumb in his mouth.

 

 

Now back to the story...

On Mother's Day when I went into Noah's room after his nap to get him out of his crib and I found him sitting in his crib sucking his thumb with the blue blanket corner in his hand.  When he saw me he got a big smile on his face and started yelling, "Mommy!".  I asked him what he got me for Mother's Day and without hesitating he grabbed his blanket and handed me the corner. 

 

Talk about something sweet for Mother's Day :)

Barabbas

The name Barabbas means

"Son of the father"

Make the name gender neutral and it means

"Child of the father"

Ok, so lets go back to Jerusalem, way back.  The people had a choice.  They could save Jesus from a fate of crucifixion or Barabbas.  We know how the story goes.  The people asked for Barabbas, the sinner to be saved and wanted Jesus' blood. The text says that Barabbas is a criminal, but lets call him what he is, just like the rest of us, a sinner.   Now I have to admit that the  Bible doesn't always keep my interest like some of my other favorite books, but there are some stories that just stick with me and this is one of them.

Within those black and red letters there is such beautiful and painful poetry.

The people ask for Barabbas or "Child of the father".  They are asking for themselves without even knowing it.  They are asking that the "Children of God" be saved and not meet the fate of death.  When they are asked who they want in replace of Barabbas they say, "Jesus".  They can't save themselves from death.  Only through the blood of Jesus, their Messiah can they be saved.  In that scene Jesus is not surprised that the Children need him.  For that is why He is there. 

Beautiful.  Painful. Poetry.

 

Happy Easter

1,000 Cranes

Fun run, Cranes, an Cancer survivors:  How are they connected?!

Several months back my boot camp instructor Paul had mentioned to me that he was heading up a 5K/10K fun run in Plano, IL in April 2013.  My other boot campers and I decided that we would sign up for the 10K (this is what peer pressure does to a girl).  Paul told us that the proceeds from the event will go to the "1,000 Cranes Retreat for Cancer Survivors".  I made a mental note at the time to research the origins of 1,000 cranes, but like most of my mental notes this note got lost in the junk drawer of my mind somewhere between the tape dispensers, post-it notes and all in one screwdriver.

This Christmas I was reminded of the "1,000 cranes" when my nephew Collin handed me a paper crane that he had folded and explained to me that he learned about a girl who had cancer and her goal was to fold 1,000 crane because it would make her well. 

So tonight I looked into the legend of the 1,000 cranes and this is what I discovered (from several sources and sorry for not citing them, but this is a blog not a paper):

~It is legend that a crane lives up to 1,000 years and throughout Asia this bird is a symbol of hope, happiness, and eternal youth.  From that came the idea that if you fold 1,000 origami cranes, one for each year of a cranes life, a crane will visit you and grant you a wish.  Shortly after the end of World War II there was a young Japanese girl named Sadako Sasaki who was diagnosed with leukemia after being exposed to radiation after the bombing of Hiroshima.  Sadako became determined to fold 1,000 cranes in hopes of recovering good health, happiness, and a world of eternal peace.  She completed 644 before she died, her classmates folded the remaining 356 to honor her.~

So how does this all tie in?  Well the 1,000 Cranes Retreat for Cancer Survivors takes the hope that the cranes represent and gives those in attendance some rest for their soul.  By participating in an event like the Plano Baloney Fun Run you get to be part of their opportunity and in my opinion (which is almost never, but usually correct) this is good for your soul too. If you are interested in the race you can look up Plano Baloney Fun Run on Facebook or go to active.com to sign up.

I am declaring that this year be the year of 1,000 cranes! 

Find a way to "fold some cranes" for people in your life :)

Crane made by Collin Beduhn 

Pink Highlights

This past weekend my family celebrated our Christmas.  For the past few years my Dad has had a drawing for $100.  If your name is chosen you have the next year to spend the $100 on any person or cause that you think needs it.  I am still waiting for the year that my name is drawn :)
This past year my sister Chelsea had the honor of choosing the home for the money. This is the story that the $100 took.

~My sister explains that this fall she was getting her hair cut at a salon in Muscatine, IA (where she now lives).  Her stylist was finishing up with a customer who looked to be about 6 years old and she had beautiful brown hair.  She was telling the stylist that she loved her new hair cut and she thought her sister would be very jealous. 

Just before Christmas my sister visited the same salon for a trim.  Chelsea noticed that her stylist was putting pink highlights in a little girl's hair.  As she sat there she realized that it was same girl that was there the last time Chelsea had her hair cut.  In her mind Chelsea questioned why a girl so young would be getting highlights.  When the girl was finished getting her hair done she came and sat on the couch next to Chelsea.  The girl looked at Chelsea and said, "My mom said that I could get pink highlights in my hair before it all falls out." (Talk about a humbling moment)

Following that appointment Chelsea was heading out of town to see some friends from college and on her way out of town she stopped by a gas station.  When she was checking out she noticed a donation can sitting by the register.  On the can was a picture of a six year old girl name Riley who has brain cancer the same girl who just had touches of pink added to her hair.  There was a benefit planned in the month of January for her.

So it was destined that the money would go to Riley and her pink highlights. ~

As my sister told this story to us my eyes filled up with tears. Chelsea adds that on the facebook page regarding Riley there is a picture of the little girl with a smile and the absence of those pink highlights and beautiful brown hair. 

 For me this story isn't about Chelsea being generous to a girl she doesn't know.  This story is about being humbled.  I am guilty about making snap judgments of people all the time.  Our purpose isn't to judge, but to find out the story.  It is amazing how much difference a story can make.

One

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The Vote

Today I visited a two-year old daycare classroom where my friend teaches.  I was discussing with her how I had just voted and so she asked the darling two-year olds who were sitting eating snack if they voted.  Many answered, "Yes", but she could have asked, "How many of you have antlers?" and the response would still have been the same.  Oh the sweet innocence.  There was one girl who answered "yes" to the voting question so my friend asked her who she voted for.  With a big smile on her face she answered, "Candy!". 

Now that is a platform I can get behind!

Jacket

This past weekend I took place in the Hot Chocolate 5K/15K in Chicago, IL.  Let me emphasize the "5K" part of that title!  It was a fun race to take part in and with 40,000 runners/walkers it was the largest race by far that I have participated in.  The charity benefiting from the race was the Ronald McDonald House which is a well deserving cause.  Another way runners could give to a cause was by shedding their clothes.  Any clothes taken off at the starting line or during the race (don't worry there were no streakers) were donated to a mission in Chicago.  While I was waiting in my corral before the run began there were these two women who got in line right next to me and I notice that one of them was wearing a very nice Columbia fleece jacket.  Just before the horn buzzed us to our destiny of 3.1 or 9.3 miles for the morning the lady took her Columbia fleece jacket off and hung it on the fence and said, "You have been a great coat, now go be great for someone else".  I couldn't help but get choked up.  The giving spirit some people have is just an awesome thing to witness. 

Now there may be people who read this and think, "What is the big deal, it is just one jacket?".  Well my friends I would like to direct you to one of my favorite stories:

There was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing.

He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach

and saw a human figure moving like a dancer.

He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day,

and so, he walked faster to catch up.

As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man,

and that what he was doing was not dancing at all.

The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects,

and throwing them into the ocean.

He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?"

asked the somewhat startled wise man.

To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out.

If I don't throw them in, they'll die."

Upon hearing this, the wise man commented,

"But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach

and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"

At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean.

As it met the water, he said, "I made a difference to that one!"

 

My running mate Ashley and I after our race!



 

I challenge everyone to find a starfish or jacket :)

 

And Make A Difference

Let Me Hold You Longer

My baby Noah is no longer a baby.  Noah is one.  He is a walking, yelling, food throwing, run over the dog with his blue pick up truck, refuse to get his diaper changed, three toothed amazing gift of a boy.  Like I have said before Noah is my daily reminder that unconditional love is real.

Photo By: Ellie Piper

Photography Studio 37

I was going through his many books and I came across one entitled Let Me Hold You Longer
By Karen Kingsbury.  I couldn't bring myself to actually read it out loud to Noah because the words make me weep.  I recieved this book as a baby shower gift from my Aunt Cindy and Aunt Dixie and they warned me of the books ability to turn on the water works.  I believe they told me that they were both crying their eyes out in the Target book aisle.

 

"Long ago you came to me, a miracle of firsts:

First smiles and teeth and baby steps, a sunbeam on the burst.

But one day you will move away and leave to me your past,

and I will be left thinking a lifetime of your lasts..."

 

(Hello tears!)

 

"The last time that I held a bottle to your baby lips. 

The last time that I lifted you and held you on my hip. 

The last time when you woke up crying needing to be walked,

when last you crawled up with your blanket, wanting to be rocked."

 

(Are the tears decorating your face yet?!)

 

The last time when you ran to me, still small enough to hold. 

The last time that you said you'd marry me when you grow old. 

 Precious, simple moments and bright flashes from your past

would I have held on longer if I'd know they were your last?"

 

(and if I wasn't blubbering already)

(the book ending to finalize my sob fest)

 

"For come some bright fall morning, you'll be going far away. 

College life will beckon in a brilliant sort of way. 

One last hug, one last good-bye, one quick and hurried kiss. 

One last time to understand just how much you'll be missed. 

I'll watch you leave and think how fast our time together passed. 

Let me hold on longer, God, to every precious last.

 

If you are a mother of a boy and you haven't cried in a day or so you should really read the whole book.  I am willing to share our copy :)



 

 

 

 



Noah and Maggie

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